This feels a little petty and slightly Freudian, but Fezboy!is compelled to share the weirdness that is his mother. Yes, Mother of Fezboy! was turned loose on the Internet about a year ago. Fezboy! thought that after time her interest would fade, but, alas Fezboy! was mistaken. It seems that the concept of a captive audience has given her all the confidence to use email as a platform to spew inanities indiscriminately.

"Yes, Fezboy!, but what do you call this blog??"

Certainly, Gentle Reader, you have a point. However, Fezboy! is not sending each post to your Inbox, cluttering up the already tornado-wreckage appearing thing it has become. You are surfing whereas Fezboy! is usually trying to find some nugget of information when he opens his Inbox. Fezboy! would venture that you are doing the same when you open your Inbox.

Anyway, all gibbering aside, this intermittent feature will highlight brilliant tidbits and other bon mots from my mother in her daily blather, otherwise known as her daily email. Read along for a few days before you jump to her defense. Feel free to comment anyway. So, from the last week, here are some mental commestibles for your grey matter:

From the distant past (I still keep this one for giggles)
[Fezboy!], you were in Germany on alert to take off at a moment’s notice to the war. I would really like to know how that was for you. I would love to talk to you about it. Ben and Emily, we were back home in front of the TV watching the war like a long, non stop movie and wearing yellow ribbons. Emily gave me an American Flag to fly for my birthday that year which I still fly on every patriotic occasion. The whole country had finally become so patriotic, us included. Amazing.

On its face this seems like a nostalgic mother fondly recalling her son?s heroic sacrifice in time of war. Fezboy! was doing this only to hurt her. Like Fezboy!?s next plot might involve something a bit more drastic, like wearing fingernail polish or something. . .

Yick, this is all sounding a little maudlin. Fezboy! promises they won?t all be so pity-party

This greeted me early in the morning on Mardi Gras/Shrove Tuesday:
Hi Kiddos–Its Mardi Gras!… Hooray!… The only French holiday celebrated in America. Are you celebrating Mardi Gras with some delicious cajun food?
Like crawdaddies, jambalaya, dirty rice, red beans, alligator, gumbo? Well,
its not my fave foods, but it sure is a good party.

Just tryin? to figure out how it is the only French holiday celebrated in America. Mardi Gras is more a Christian holiday than anything I thought.

From 4 March, 2001:
Hi Kiddos–Wow I just discovered daylight when I got up before 0630 this
morning.

Well, this is all Fezboy! has for this little intermittent feature at this time. Stay tuned for further posts. Actually, Fezboy! is considering a second blog where he merely posts his mother?s daily email barrage. A sort of "for posterity" type of thing.

Well, that didn?t go so bad now. . .